


See You in My Dreams

by JungTaco



Series: The Magic in Your Soul [2]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Fantasy, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-26
Updated: 2016-02-26
Packaged: 2018-05-23 09:21:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6112077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JungTaco/pseuds/JungTaco





	See You in My Dreams

It was Junmyeon’s tenth birthday when, after a sleepless night and a nervous breakfast, he and his father set off towards the forest in somewhat the boy called adventure. It was early morning, the sky a pale blue and Junmyeon’s smile was slightly brighter than the sun that was just rising. Little Junmyeon already fought imaginary monsters in his head, making his parents smile fondly, wondering what beings were wondering his mind at that time, what story he had read in the darkness of the night, with just a torch lighting the little adventurer’s path as his fingers followed lines of ink on paper. His mother had kissed his forehead dearly and watched him cling to his father’s arm as they set off.

Junmyeon now understandably doesn’t recall any of these details, which is only natural, due to, of course, time causing memories to faint out, and because there was one certain event that overshadowed more than a single day of his life.

His adventurous spirit allowed him to stumble past bushes and trees, letting him find the mouth of a cave, somewhere off the beaten track, so far away from the path they were following that his father’s voice was barely audible from where he was.

“Daddy, come here!” he had shouted back before bouncing inside the cave, curiosity at its peak, even though it wasn’t likely that anything interesting would be hidden there - but for a child like him everything was interesting. What he found though was maybe just something he had imagined, something from the stories in his mind, be them written or unwritten.

There was someone there, lying on the ground, hair fanned over the rock floor, his eyes closed. He seemed to be sleeping.

Intrigued, little Junmyeon didn’t utter a word and approached him, wondering if he was actually dead. He wasn’t scared at all, so he squatted besides the person, examining him closely, before a thought crossed his mind briefly. Was he cold maybe? The stranger wore no clothes. With rose cheeks, Junmyeon removed his jacket and placed it over the man. The little boy was no fool. He knew that he shouldn’t spend time around strangers, how his parents told him to, but he also knew that he should be kind to others. Also, his dad was just outside the cave by now probably, maybe closer that he had thought. He was going to stay there just a few more seconds. He was gazing at his eyelashes, throwing a faint shadow in the weak light seeping in through the entrance of the cave. If they were a little deeper inside, there would probably be complete darkness, and the thought made Junmyeon shudder, despite the fact that a part of his mind wanted to explore it further. Thinking about this, and not his actions, Junmyeon poked the other’s cheek, watching, with no immediate reaction, how his eyelashes fluttered.

The child jolted when his eyes opened. They did so slowly, as if he was waking up from a deep sleep, which he probably was. He quickly moved to get up, wanting to run out to his father, but when the stranger turned his head to look at him, he stopped only to look at his eyes. Those pale blue eyes couldn’t be from this world. He couldn’t see them very well due to the weaker light, but he could distinguish that color and the strange vibrance. Little Junmyeon’s heart skipped a beat, because they were too unreal and beautiful to be from this world. But they were just right for _his_ world, the one in his head, where all fairy tales existed at the same time. His lips parted and his own eyes widened in awe.

The man stared back at him, mildly surprised and seemingly disoriented. He slowly sat up, glancing at the piece of clothing splayed over his body before looking at Junmyeon again. He parted his lips, but then changed his mind in a moment, closing his mouth again, blinking a couple of times.

“A-Are you h-human… mister?” he quietly inquired.

“Human?” The child nodded. He seemed to be thinking hard about what to answer. “I’m afraid I don’t know what a human is… It’s strange… How I… I am communicating with you even. How do I even know how to do this?...” he mused, voice almost a whisper as he stared into thin air for a while.

Needless to say, little Junmyeon was exalted. What was this creature he didn’t know, but he was sure now that he couldn’t be real. And everything that couldn’t be real was fascinating, and it needed a story. Or more. Now he was convinced that he was in one, and there was no way of turning back, not that he would have done it.

“Are you… a human?” the stranger asked.

“Yes. I am a human!” The child wanted to say more than that, but the questions stumbled over each other, ending up clogging his mind.

“Well that means I am not a human.” He stood up. “Look how small you are. If humans are this small, then I am definitely not a human.”

Under usual circumstances, the boy would have been mad that he was called small, but right now he had no time for that.

“That’s because I’m a child!” he stood up as well, grabbing his jacket off the ground, where it was left to drop. “Humans are… they look like you, except the eyes.”

“Oh? How do human eyes look?”

“They don’t have that color. I haven’t seen any human with eyes like that, mister!” He looked up at him, tiptoeing, wanting to take a closer look. “What’s your name, mister?”

“Name? You mean… How I’m called?” He nodded. “I don’t have one. Because no one calls me.”

“No one talks to you?”

“I have never talked to anyone before. Do you talk a lot? Do humans talk a lot? These humans make me interested, little human. Do you have a name?”

Junmyeon grinned, eyes crinkling with joy. There were now even more unknown things about this person, and none of his previous questions had got an answer, but he would find them.

“I’m going to tell you about humans, mister, and you will tell me about yourself, okay?” The man only nodded, but he was still in the middle of the movement when the child continued. “Some of us talk a lot! Not all of us, but some of us. I don’t talk too much, but even the ones that don’t talk much talk at least once in their lives!... I think. Yes, they must! How would you live without talking? I mean unless you can’t talk…” he looked away for a moment, lost in his own train of thoughts, before quickly looking up again, meeting the stranger’s gaze focused on him and listening with an evident interest, blue eyes widened as he waited to hear more.

“So there are people who can’t talk? Why is that?”

“Because they are sick.”

“Sick?”

“Yes. That means they are flawed. I mean their bodies are flawed…”

“So they are not flawed, only their bodies are.”

“Yes! But, mister, I don’t think any body is flawless… we all get sick a lot of times.”

“So you can’t talk a lot of times. That’s unfortunate, talking is really fun. You can talk about a lot of things.” The man sat on the ground in front of Junmyeon.

“I usually can talk. Are you cold, mister?”

Little Junmyeon raised his jacket, but the other responded, “No. Do you feel cold a lot?”

“A lot during winter. I don’t like winter.” A shiver ran down his spine involuntarily at the thought of snow and wind and ice.

“Winter?”

“Oh. Winter is that time of the year when it’s super cold! And everything is white! For a while at least…”

“You said you don’t like it, but you seem pretty… happy talking about it? Or are you happy because you are talking?” The man tilted his head, genuine curiosity audible in his every word and little Junmyeon had never felt more important, not even on his birthdays. He loved his family and friends dearly, but none of them were from another world. The boy began to fear the possibility of simply imagining the stranger in front of him like he had done years ago. He recalled no such memory, but his parents told him he used to talk to himself. That’s what they had thought before hearing names that weren’t his and didn’t belong to any of his friends either.

“I am happy because winter is sometimes fun too. Mister…”

“Yes?”

“Are you real?” the child blinked, afraid that the man might disappear when he next opened his eyes.

“Why, yes, I’m very real. Why are you asking?”

“Because you don’t seem real…”

“And why is that?”

Junmyeon paused. It was hard for a ten-year-old to explain such a thing, but the boy truly wished to. He wanted the other to know him and he wanted to know the other.

“Because of your eyes and because real people don’t sleep naked in caves.”

“No? But I’m still real.” He smiled. “Tell me what’s exciting about winter then.”

“Christmas and snowmen!”

“What are those things?”

“Christmas is a holyday when we give gifts to each other and decorate our houses and trees. Snowmen are… People we make out of snow.”

“That sounds like fun!”

 

“It’s a lot of fun!”

“You haven’t told me your name, little human. You do have one, don’t you?”

“I do. It’s Junmyeon. You should have one too, since now there is someone to talk to you.”

“You call me ‘mister’ a lot, so can it be that?” The man smiled, a glint of joy playing in his eyes, causing more exaltation to bubble in the boy’s stomach, despite the pout that settled on his lips.

“No. ‘Mister’ can’t be a name. Hmm…” Junmyeon spent close to what he thought to be a minute searching for a deserving name for the other. He knew it would be harder than trying to find a name for a pet, since the man was not even human, but something more than that. He came up with nothing worth his expectations unfortunately, and the disappointment was visible in the slump of his narrow shoulders and in his expression.

“It’s alright, I don’t need a name. I’m sorry, Junmyeon, but we probably won’t see each other again after today.” His lips lifted in a faint smile, and the boy looked up and blinked, trying to mask his disappointment. The other saw it though, and his smile melted. He regretted his words. He didn’t think he had ever tasted this feeling before.

“I’ll try to tell you about myself then.” The boy raised his head and nodded, movement almost imperceptible. “There is not much to tell though, and it might be disappointing.” Junmyeon didn’t utter a word, only looked at him with wide, expecting eyes, and the man believed that ten different stories about him were already written in them, and that made him happy. “You found me sleeping here because that is all I do, sleep. Not because I want to or because I’m lazy, but because I must to.”

“Why is that?”

“Because I think whoever or whatever created me made a mistake.” Although the man was still smiling, the child could see his eyelids becoming heavier. All he could do was pout and whine inwardly because he wanted to spend more time with him.

“Why?”

“Because the Forest noticed something was not right. You told me about winter, didn’t you?” He nodded again. “Winter comes and goes. So does snow. You will eventually grow bigger, won’t you?”

“Yeah…”

“But while I was there, everything remained the same. Nothing changed, nothing moved…”

“So you have to sleep so that the world can be like this?”

“Exactly.”

“But you’re not asleep. And I’m still like always.”

“For now. So I have to go back to sleep, so that you can continue your life.” The man’s eyes crinkled at the corners as his smile widened and he ruffled little Junmyeon’s hair. “I’m happy I met you, Junmyeon. You’re a wonderful kid!”

“Can’t you stay awake a little longer?” the barely whispered question reached the man’s ears, but he shook his head.

“I’m really tired… I’m afraid my eyes won’t stay open for too long.” He chuckled.

“Then… at least wish me a happy birthday.” Junmyeon added, voice shy and cheeks a tone darker.

“Happy birthday, Junmyeon.”

“Thank you… I’m happy to have met you too.”

By the end of his sentence, the man was already fast asleep, having laid down again, chest now raising and descending peacefully.

When he exited the cave, the child squinted at the stronger light. He heard footsteps approaching, knowing that it was his father nearing him.

“Here you are!” the man sighed. “Glad I don’t have to spend half an hour looking for you.”

What was strange was that Junmyeon felt like more than half an hour passed since when he had met the stranger whom he really wished he could call his friend.

 

*

 

Junmyeon was barely aware that that day was his 20th birthday. It was a lazy Sunday morning, and if it wasn’t for his friends’ constant messages that reminded him of the fact that he was getting older, he would have probably forgotten about it and gone back to bed. They made him smile though. He was going to meet with them later that night, but until then, he was lucky, getting to spend the day by himself.

He had nothing special in mind for that day, maybe reading or listening to music and that was much pretty much everything he was planning on doing. That until his father cracked the door of his bedroom open, smiling and wishing him a happy birthday and asking him about his plans.

Right. It was his 20th birthday. Today, ten years passed since he met that strange being. The memory was clear in his mind, or so he thought, he thought that he hadn’t forgotten anything, but who knows? Despite this, the ten years that passed and he caught himself wondering if it was all just a dream.

A more exciting plan popped up in his mind.

 

The day was warm and the blue sky overhead almost blinding when he tried to look up. The way towards his destination seemed shorter  than he remembered, maybe because he had been more excited as a kid to reach the forest. Now he was nervous and afraid of being disappointed, of finding out that the man was just a figment of his rich imagination.

Reaching the edge of the forest, making his way through trees and bushes, he remembered that birthday, he remembered that he hadn’t slept a wink that night, because he kept thinking of that man, coming out with new questions and imagining what the answers would be. He couldn’t remembers those now, but one thing he did remember, his name, Chen. It was simple, yet fitting. Junmyeon barely remembered that he had read that name in a story before. He recalled nothing about the character whose name that was, because the Chen he had met was far more important and outshined most of the other things that were on his mind at that time.

When he reached the mouth of that cave, he realized his heart was beating faster than usual, and it wasn’t anything weird if he were to think about it. He stepped inside hesitantly.  After he made a few steps, he saw him and stopped breathing. He _was_ real.

He approached him, feeling a strange combination of feelings ready do burst in his ribcage. He was happy and nervous and confused. He wanted to wake him up, but something told him he shouldn’t do that. The urge was so strong. His teeth sunk into his bottom lip as he squatted besides Chen, only looking at him.

“Chen…” He whispered, even though he wouldn’t hear him, even though he wouldn’t respond to that name. He sat on the cold ground, hugging his knees close and resting his chin on them. He missed him. He figured he should just return home, but he came all the way here only for him. His index finger touched his cheek once, and he promised himself that he wouldn’t do that again, not to wake him up. But it was too late, because Chen’s eyelashes were already fluttering.

Junmyeon blinked, gazing at him and waiting, nervous. The other saw him and turned his head to look at him, like he had done ten years before. He blinked softly before sitting up, propping his weight on his hands. Neither of them said anything for a few seconds.

“You… You look familiar.” The boy held back from grinning. He had grown a lot, but Chen still remembered him.

“Do you remember my name?”

“Junmyeon?” The man’s eyes widened and the corners of his thin lips slowly turned upwards.

“Junmyeon.” He nodded and let the happiness take form on his face.

“You’ve… You’ve grown!”

“Well, ten years passed. Of course I grew.” He chuckled.

“Ten years only? Wow…” The other seemed genuinely surprised. Junmyeon couldn’t not notice the blue in his eyes was different, brighter than before, more lively than that pale color he had first seen when he was a kid.

“Can I hug you?” The boy bit on his lip, looking down embarrassed after letting the words slip.

“Of course you can.” The response calmed him down a bit, and Chen turned to him, sitting up properly and opening his arms a bit to welcome him. He didn’t waste any time before wrapping his arms around the man’s waist, burying his head almost naturally in the crook of his neck.

“I missed you.”

“I would have missed you too if I was aware you were not here.” The other’s reply appeared to be sincere, not at all a joke. Although he didn’t want to, Junmyeon pulled away from the embrace flushed.

“I would ask you how have you been, but… I don’t think you have much to tell me, do you?”

“That’s true, I have nothing interesting to tell you about. That’s why you should tell me what _you_ have been doing. About your world. I know what you told me last time was just the peak of the iceberg.”

“Do you even know what an iceberg is?” The man nodded. “How?”

“Strangely, I don’t know, but I know that I know a lot of things.”

“Then what more could I tell you?”

“You’ll tell me about the piece of this big world that belongs to you.” He smiled, eyes crinkling at the ends in that familiar and endearing way. Because of Junmyeon. The latter felt like a little boy again.

“I don’t think there’s much to tell…” His eyes wandered on the other’s expression, in order to brand his features into his mind more securely. “I’m in college, I have a few friends and I like to read and sing-” He partly wanted to take back the last part, but he just settled for hoping that the other wouldn’t ask him to sing, because he would certainly be a nervous mess. “And it’s my birthday… again.” A coy smile curled his lips.

“Happy birthday again!”

“Thank you.”

“We seem to meet only on important dates.”

“Yes, it does. Oh, you still don’t have a name, don’t you?”

“No. You’ll call me mister again?”

“No… How about… How about ‘Chen’?”

“Chen? You want that to be my name?” Junmyeon nodded. “Fine with me. Chen... “ He tested his new name as if tasting something new. “I finally have a name… I like it!”

“You do?” The boy could feel a relief he didn’t know he needed until then. Chen liked the name that he had given to him. It still felt like a dream and Junmyeon couldn’t help thinking about that, despite how much of a cliché it was.

“Very much!”

“I’m glad to hear that.”

Junmyeon then remembered that they didn’t have much time. Chen would get tired again soon and there were a lot of things he wanted to know about more than he wanted to talk about himself. This time around, that was much less important and exciting to him, even though he wouldn’t mind talking. Questions began popping up again in his mind, this time more complex ones, his more mature mind interested in what this being really was and about what was going on. Fairy tales were still in his heart, but so was the thirst for knowledge, one other kind of curiosity.

“Last time you said things can’t move when you’re awake.”

“Did I? Yes, I believe I did…” he mused. “What about it?”

“Does that mean… that time doesn’t move? That’s what you meant then? Maybe I don’t remember what you said well enough… But it seemed to be like that.”

“You’re really smart, Junmyeon. Even more than before. That’s what I meant exactly.” A faint smile was on Chen’s lips, whose words sounded so casual and ordinary talking about such a thing, one that Junmyeon could barely wrap his head around. It was fascinating, once again.

“How?...”

“I really don’t know how to explain it so that you can understand. You might or you might not, but that’s just how things are. Time can’t flow when I’m awake, so the only solution is to put me to sleep, weaken my power. You might get the idea a little better than you would have when you were a kid, but it’s still hard to understand for the others. That’s how I’ve been told.”

“Oh…” Junmyeon mouthed, trying to process what he had just heard. It was hard to comprehend and to believe, especially after he had spent his last ten years trying to convince himself that he hadn’t imagined everything. He hardly knew what was real and what was not, where the line between possible and impossible was. Maybe impossible didn’t exist after all.

“I’m glad that… well… nevermind.”

“Do you… want to know why I’m not dead then?”

“...Yes.”

“I wonder about that too. I’m not sure actually. But I’m glad I’m not. I wouldn’t have met you otherwise.”

“I’m happy too! Have you ever talked to someone else? Has there been someone like me who woke you up until now?”

“No one who woke me up.” Chen shook his head. “But I had a friend before. Maybe I could take you to him…” The man seemed to regret his words as soon as he finished the sentence. “But I don’t think that would be a good idea.”

“Who’s that friend? Another human?” Junmyeon blinked, confused and intrigued. On a second thought, he realized it couldn’t be a human most probably. “There are more people like you?”

“Sort of. They are not really like me, but… there are people there who could not be called humans, like you. Each with their purpose. The ones like him aren’t supposed to get along with people though… Even though he does, in a way.” He muttered, apparently to himself. “But that’s a story for another time.” A rather sad smile settled on his lips this time around. Junmyeon didn’t ask why, although he wanted to know everything. He wanted to know about this story, but he was aware of the lack of time they had, and finding out more about Chen was more important. There seemed to be a new world behind Chen which he couldn’t see, but could somehow feel, now that he came in contact with it. He knew nothing about it though, and there were now so many questions bugging him. But he also didn’t want to be a burden and talk too much, tiring the man even more. He decided to try to hide the burn in his being that urged him to find out more.

“One more thing…”

“Mhm?”

“Time is not moving now, right?”

“That’s correct.”

“But I’m still moving. How?...”

“Ah… Well... It’s because you’re next to me. And right now all the power is here, concentrated where we are. Isn’t that weird?” The energy was seeping out of him once again, and Junmyeon tried not to see it.

“That’s… amazing.” He didn’t know what else to say, how to convey his thoughts into words anymore, because they were too fast and abundant and everything was surreal. Surreal and beautiful, that was Chen.

“You think?”

“Yes…”

Silence fell upon them, and Junmyeon felt content like this despite his desire to know everything. Only if they had more time…

“Can I come back again… sometime?”

“Who knows? I think you can, since you came the second time. I really hope you do.” Chen smiled, but the boy couldn’t help but feel that he shouldn’t have disturbed him at all, that maybe something bad would happen because of him. This wasn’t supposed to have happened, was it? And if Chen didn’t know, then there was probably no way of telling right now.

They spent a little more time in the presence of each other saying nothing, Junmyeon noticing how Chen grew more and more tired, and the latter simply seeming to wait to just fall asleep again.

“I can’t keep my eyes open for much longer.”

“I know. I should leave.” Chen confirmed with a small nod.

“You’re like a beautiful dream, Junmyeon. My sleep is deep, so I don’t really dream. But you’re just like one. Thank you.” He leaned in and pressed a kiss on the boy’s cheek, near the corner of his mouth. “Thank you.” He smiled, Junmyeon gazing at him, speechless, with something he could describe as fireworks bursting in his chest. “I hope we see each other again.”

*

On his every birthday after that, Junmyeon was tormented by his dual thoughts, a part of them urging him to go see Chen, while the other part convinced him against this. He didn’t know if it was wrong or right. It felt right to him, but acting on his feelings not expecting any sort of consequences was foolish. That’s why he waited. But on his 30th birthday, he thought it was enough waiting.

Another decade passed and despite now feeling like a proper adult, Junmyeon felt the same things while on his way towards meeting Chen. It felt weird, in the best way possible, despite the faint insecurity nagging in the back of his mind. The other told him he hoped to see him again, but what if he changed his mind? What if he forgot? What if he would get mad? What if something bad would happen? Nevertheless, it was too late to turn back now.

And this time he didn’t hesitate before softly touching his cheek, not even trying to control the smile that automatically formed on his face.

“Chen.” he whispered, and the man smiled even before his eyes opened. They were yet a different shade of blue, or rather grey. He didn’t like this color as much as the others and it reminded him of the overcast sky now hidden by the rocks above their head. Then he realized. It _was_ the same color. Junmyeon was even more fascinated by the being in front of his eyes. He gazed at him, the slightly blurred image of Chen in his mind from years ago refreshed again.

“How long has it been?”

“Just ten years.”

“Oh. You’ve grown.” He chuckled. “Grown so much. It’s amazing.”

“It’s not amazing, it’s just natural.” he shrugged.

“But it seems just yesterday you were… so young and now… Wow…” Chen was gazing at him, unable to take his eyes off the man that sprouted from that boy he knew. He looked like him, but somehow he didn’t at the same time. “Happy birthday?”

“Yes. Thank you.” The other laughed. “I’m now an adult, officially.”

“I want to know more about you. I feel like I know you but I don’t know enough…”

“You know the important stuff. And it’s kind of hard to tell you everything in detail since… we don’t spend that much time together.”

“I wish we could…” A smile curled his lips, and Junmyeon couldn’t find any mirth in his expression.

“I wish we could too… I graduated college, by the way!” he continued quickly, refusing to let any kind of negative emotion to further burden the air. “Do you know what college is?”

“I’m not sure, but I suppose it’s a kind of school?”

“Yes, it is.”

“I wouldn’t have doubted you would. I’m happy for you.” He smiled, a different smile this time, but now it was one that seemed to be hiding something, something that Chen didn’t dare tell him it seemed.

“Is there something you want to tell me?”

“No…”

“Please tell me.” Junmyeon insisted. “Because we don't have much time… We don’t really have many occasions… so…” The man rubbed the back of his neck.

“I wanted to ask if you have someone you love.” Chen visibly forced a chuckle.

“Oh. Was that it? Well, no… I don’t have anyone, why?”

“Too bad. They’d be lucky.”

“You think?” Junmyeon laughed cheerfully.

“Of course! Why would I lie?”

“Thank you.” The laugh melted into a soft smile as he gazed at Chen. “Do you think… we can get out of here for a while?” He wanted to be able to see him better in the light of the day, making sure to memorize every angle of his features and every color nature blessed him with. Although he couldn’t really say Chen was blessed at all unfortunately.

“We can.”

And so they did. Chen wobbled a little, getting used to walking because he hadn’t done it since many years ago. Junmyeon didn’t know how he was even able to walk at all, but he had learnt how to believe the unbelievable.

 

Junmyeon gazed at him, and the other didn’t seem to notice as he looked around. The younger realized everything was still, not the slightest wind was blowing, no bird sang and no leaf shifted. He knew they couldn’t.

Besides his foot, on a fresh blade of grass, they saw a red spot, a ladybug, standing still and seeming to wait. Chen bowed down and with the tip of his index finger touched the insect lightly. It started moving, climbing on his extended finger, while Junmyeon watched in awe. The ladybug spread its wings a little after that, lifting up in the air and flying away. After just a second though, it stopped midflight. It was as if the rest of the world was frozen. It was scary, and it was the first time he saw it, but he wasn’t scared of Chen. The latter saw it and he felt fortunate.

“Did you tell anyone about me?” he asked.

“No. They wouldn’t believe me probably… and if they did, I wouldn’t want anyone else to bother you.” ‘I was selfish too’ was on the tip of hos tongue, but he closed his mouth before the words escaped him. At first, when he was a kid, he felt the need to tell everyone about his discovery, the man from fairy tales, but he was afraid back then that people wouldn’t believe him, would tell him that Chen was just an imaginary friend and shatter his dream. When he grew older, meeting Chen again, that dream, which wasn’t really a dream, couldn’t be shattered anymore. But other things invaded his mind, and while he lost the desire to talk about Chen to anyone else, the possibility of him getting hurt arouse. He hadn’t thought about it at first, but Chen wouldn’t be the only one suffering if that were to happen, although in the beginning he had just worried about him.

“And if they did they must just be scared.”

“Well… Yeah… I didn’t think of that.”

“But you’re not scared.”

“Why would I be?” Chen only smiled in response. His eyes looked more beautiful than before now that Junmyeon could see then in the daylight. “Is it ok that I came to see you? Do you think something bad will happen because I woke you up? Three times even…”

“I really don’t know… Did something bad happen after you woke me up the first time? Or last time? If not then, I don’t think there’s any problem. Your happiness is important.”

Junmyeon only nodded gratefully, thoughts racing through his head and wishes blooming. He felt that this rhythm was the right one, the one at which he was doing thigs slowly and nothing was affected, maybe besides the fact that he started to miss Chen more and more after each encounter, even though that feeling was somewhere hidden in the depths of his heart.

 

*

 

The following year, Junmyeon paid him a visit again, but this time Chen continued to sleep peacefully.

  
*  


When Chen opened his eyes his smile froze on his lips at the realization that Junmyeon was growing, getting older too quickly or so it seemed to him. Another decade passed and to him, it seemed like a week.

“Did you miss me, Chen?”

“I’m happy you didn’t forget about me.” He sat up embracing him and leaning his head on his shoulder. Life was moving, naturally, moving and taking away youth and energy, and Chen was a little scared that this Junmyeon might not be the same as the one before, despite the resemblance they had. His eyes were wiser, his smile more knowing and the creases on his forehead deeper.

“Of course I didn’t forget, how can you think that I could?” He could still feel it was Junmyeon he was speaking to and hugging. “I suppose you don’t have much to tell me, but I do have something to tell you. I don’t know how important it is to you though, but it is the most important thing in my life.”

“Tell me! If it’s important to you then I want to know.” He pulled back, looking at him expectantly, with a glint of fear in his eyes, a very faint one. He knew what was to follow and he was happy for Junmyeon, although there was some kind of jealousy as well.

“I’m married now.”

He had never felt such a thing before. It was unknown and unpleasant, making him desire to be with Junmyeon so much. In any way possible. Only to be there, to actually see him grow old, to talk to him and to get to know him better. Not to be a fairy tale being. To be someone from Junmyeon’s world.

People believed in reincarnation. This was the first time Chen pondered the idea of dying.

For a brief moment, he thought that it was possible. But he smiled, resigned, and told himself that he wouldn’t think about it anymore, just continuing his existence in the same way.

He smiled, hoping that Junmyeon didn’t read all that in his eyes.

“I’m so happy to hear that.” were his genuine words.

“And I… also want you to meet someone. Yijeo-”

“Daddy! I saw a deer outside before you started talking to your friend!” A thin but excited voice came from behind Junmyeon, and he chuckled, not knowing if he should believe his son or if he had just invented the said deer, because he had the same imagination as he did when he was little.

“Daddy?” Chen blinked. “Junmyeon, you have a child?!” he gasped before grinning, waiting for the boy to step aside from his hiding place. He was so small that Junmyeon’s frame easily hid him from his sight.

“Daddy, it was a boy with antlers, I’m not joking!”

“Really, Yijeongie? Too bad I didn’t get to see him.” At this point, his father considered his son’s words, and he didn’t think that it was impossible. He stopped that a while back.

The child approached them, nodding before looking at Chen, bowing politely and introducing himself, like Junmyeon had instructed him.

“You’re so cute, Yijeongie! You look so much like your dad when he was little.” Yijeong looked younger than Junmyeon was when he had first met him, and he didn’t seem to ponder over the idea that Chen looked so young despite knowing his father for so long, neither over the thing that they were in a cave. He only seemed slightly intrigued by the man before him, and he wondered what Junmyeon had told him before coming here.

“Daddy, is he the mister that came from fairy tales?” Yijeong whispered in Junmyeon’s ear, but loud enough so that Chen heard every word, chuckling quietly.

“Yes, he is.” The man whispered back before pecking his forehead and looking at Chen again, smile weakening as he saw him grow tired again. It was faster than usual, Chen could tell, although he wasn’t sure why. He supposed the emotional strain was at fault.

“How old are you, Yijeong?” Chen asked, struggling to keep his eyes open for as much as he could.

“I’m six, mister.” The man smiled, recalling that Junmyeon was calling him the same, in the same innocent way.

“You’re really like your father.”

“Should we leave?” Junmyeon spoke, not hiding the disappointment in his voice at the fact that they had to part again so soon. Chen looked at him, but didn’t respond, because he didn’t want to say yes and state the obvious. There was a silent apologize in his gaze, and Junmyeon understood.

 

*  


His hair was sprinkled with silver and the lines on his forehead were more pronounced. Chen swallowed, hoping that the other couldn’t see how his eyes had got teary with both sadness and happiness that the man still hadn’t forgotten him. He could see though the way the faint light that managed to snake inside, reflecting in his eyes, that were now a faint orange from what he could see, the color of the sun setting.

“Let’s get outside.” he uttered, voice gentler than any time before, or maybe it was just Chen’s impression. He nodded and took a head of his hand as they stepped outside. He looked at the man for a few seconds, tearing his gaze away to look around, at the colors melting into one another on the sky, pale mixing with the black of the trees between which he could see figments of the sunset. Junmyeon was beautiful but he couldn’t bear to look at him and remember that he was even older now.

“Why did you wake up, Chen? And why was I able to wake you up and only every ten years? I’ve been thinking about that…”

“Did you come to any conclusions? Because I don’t know. I haven’t really got the chance to think about it.” He looked down, holding a little tighter onto the man’s hand. Junmyeon hadn’t mentioned anything about his life anymore, and it didn’t seem like he wanted to. Chen also thought that maybe it really wasn’t that important anyway, and maybe he got to know enough of Junmyeon, just what had been reserved for him to know. Maybe it was meant to be like that. This kind of thinking was one he didn’t believe in and wasn’t fond of, but it was a bitter consolation.

“Not really… I just thought that it might have been a kind of compensation for you… because you couldn’t live properly.”

“That might be it.” He smiled, stepping closer to him. “I’m grateful. Thank you for coming here and not forgetting about me.” Junmyeon flashed, once again, probably the most gentle smile Chen had seen, although he thought that maybe because his memory was failing him or because of the soft light lighting his features. He wanted to burn this moment into his mind and prayed that he was allowed to dream about it, to be able to have him by his side while he slept as well.  

“Thank you too.”

“I don’t believe you have a reason to thank me. But you know better.”

“I do. I can’t say you changed my life completely. And I can’t tell how different my life would have been if it weren’t for you, but… You mean a lot to me in a way I can’t explain. You showed me a hidden part of this world, a small one most probably. I wish I could discover more about it and about you, but I felt it wasn’t my business, I wasn’t supposed to.”

“You’re part of it now that you know even just this small portion.”

  
*  


Despite the smile that was Junmyeon’s face, Chen had to bite his lip and to hold back his tears, which were more stubborn this time.

“Don’t cry, please.” The man whispered, smile faltering for a bit. “Smile for me, Chen?”

He tried, he really did, but it was hard. Junmyeon had seemingly grown much older than he should have, more than he had expected. His hair had gone mostly grey and he could feel life was seeping out of him. This was the last time.

Chen wrapped his arms around him tightly, noticing that he was frailer than before.

“Thank you again…” his whispers were unsteady as he allowed the tears to flow now that the man couldn’t see him. He only embraced him as well in silence, rubbing his back in a comforting manner.

“My life was good, Chen… The only regret I have is… not having enough time with you. I’m sorry for making you cry.”

“No…” he sobbed. “Don’t apologize for something like that.” He tried wiping his tears as he pulled back, but his now dark blue eyes were still glistening. “Continue to be happy, Junmyeon, please. Spend the rest of the time with your family… and the people you love.” He swallowed, barely able to control his voice. The pain was overwhelming, and he didn’t understand how humans withstood this kind of feelings. It was the first time he was experiencing it and he felt like burying himself in Junmyeon’s arms and never letting go again. He felt lucky he was going to continue sleeping for the rest of his existence.

“I will do so.” the man’s eyes were teary as well, his vision blurry. He leaned closer to Chen and pressed a kiss on his forehead. He didn’t like saying goodbye, so he didn’t. Chen didn’t know what really a goodbye was, so he didn’t either.

 

 

 

 

 

When he next woke up, out of habit only, he did so to silence and blunt pain instead of a smile, and going back to sleep seemed longer than ever.


End file.
